Friday, June 30, 2006

That's You, That Is.

Our company is launching a new Roman-themed MMORPG. This conversation may or may not have taken place yesterday:


K: Ooh, and we've got an interview with History Today.

Me: Excellent!

[Pause]

Me: See that centurion? You love him.

[Pause]

Me: See that leaky impluvium? That's your girlfriend, that is.

[Pause]

Me: See that testudo formation? That's you, that is.

[Pause]

S: Patroclus.

Me: Mmm?

S: It's a BBC magazine.

Me: Oh.


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24 comments:

Smat said...

ooh that brings back memories that does. We were just talking about those sketches last night (cue spooky music)

Dave again said...

Ahem. 'These days I want to accompany every post with a song.'

My music library is gradually filling with songs I would never have come across before. So where's today's Roman-themed piece? In Latin ideally.

patroclus said...

Too busy right now, Dave, but oo, I know the very one! Stay tuned...

Interpreter Pavlov said...

Oh...oh...somebody tell what an MMORPG is!

I've only got as far as:

K: Mehercle, colloquium cum Historia Hodierna habemus.

Ego: O excellentia!

[Intermissio]

Ego: Videsne illum centurionem? Eum amas.

Spinsterella said...

WTF is MMORPG?

Is is something to do with video-games? But what does that have to do with History Today (which I have actually read; in fact I believe it's a different publicatin to the BBC's mag, which is just called 'History')?

*confused*

Oh - cos it's Roman themed. A Roman-themed video game. I get it.

Dave again said...

RPG stands for rocket-propelled grenade.

It probably also is an acronym for Role Playing Game.

I have a very old copy of Age of Empires in my drive at the moment, so suspect this may be what we're talikng about (if so, do I win a copy?).

MMO though...

Dave again said...

Ohh, is it Massive Multiplayer Online ?

Is it? is it?

If it is, do I win a copy now?

Not that I am either massive or a multiplayer. I prefer (I was going to say 'to play with myself' but that might be misconstrued) solo games.

patroclus said...

Well done Dave - it's a massively multiplayer online role-playing game. Like World of Warcraft, but set in Roman times.

You don't get 'a copy' as such - you play it on the internet. And if you're naughty, you get crucified for a week, and people throw stuffed dormice at you and laugh.

At least I hope they have stuffed dormice. And haruspices. And Cornelia and Flavia and Marcus and Sextus and Davus Paedagogus, and all the other characters from that Latin textbook version of the OC, Ecce Romani.

Billy said...

The big question is: will Biggus Dickus feature in some capacity?

Billy said...

"that Latin textbook version of the OC"

Julii Cooper?

Heather said...

Oooh, never really been into role playing games but one set in Roman times, I may just be tempted.

Oh who am I kidding, sign me up now. I want to play at being Roman! Pompei and Herculaneum are possibly the most incredible places I've ever been.

As long as I don't have to eat any Garum* or stuffed dormice to play. I don't really fancy being crucified either... but oooh I want to be Roman!

* Fermented fish sauce- urrrk!

The Blind Flaneur said...

I spent my formative years playing Dungeons and Dragons. As a consequence, I have no childhood friends. Except the noble elf, Grabfetter, of course.

PEANUT said...

on the intornet, no one knose yore realy all SPARTERCUS

LC said...

MMORPGs are like blogging, but in 3D.

patroclus said...

Think about it, Billy: Marcus and Sextus. Marcus was the geeky one with rich parents, you know, like that one that likes Death Cab for Cutie, while Sextus was the son of a slave, from the wrong side of the tracks, just like the annoying one with the bad hair and the interminable crush on that dippy bird from next door. Flavia, let's call her. Cornelia was more like Summer. It all fits.

First Nations said...

with a 'deus ex machina'to randomize the playstream. won't that scare the kiddies when hera drops out of the lights!

Tim Footman said...

A question. If, in the early 90s, comedy was the new rock 'n' roll, were Punt and Dennis George and Ringo?

Pashmina said...

I think I might have fancied Marcus.

Dear god, did I just type that out loud? He did look a tiny little bit like Adam Brody though, which makes it all right. Ish.

patroclus said...

How would we have made it through Latin classes otherwise, Pash?

I'm gutted I can't find any decent pictures from Ecce Romani anywhere. We could put the 'Marcus/Seth' question to the vote!

sara said...

Where are Caecilius, Quintus and Grumius?
In Hortus?

Sara said...

Ita vero.........Nota vero. Got sent out of latin for that.

patroclus said...

Grumius? You just made that up!

Davus est in horto. Cornelia et Flavia sub arborem sedent. Felis est in ramis.

That's all I remember, until the coach turns over outside the Little Chef on the Via Appia, and then the whole thing somehow morphs into the Fellowship of the Ring in my mind.

Pashmina said...

I don't want to raise any hopes here, but there's an infinitely small chance that Ecce Romani 1 is languishing amongst other childhood relics in a box somewhere in my mum's outhouse (or "pavillion" as she likes to call it).

However I'm not due to go down there for a while so don't anyone hold your breath on that one.

Tim Footman said...

On all our Latin text books, the word "LATIN" was amended to "EATING" within 24 hours of issue.

If you didn't change it, you were a poof.

It was that kind of school.