Monday, October 08, 2007

Westward Ho, Then

You know that thing where you meet someone on a chat forum, but they've got a made-up name, and so you don't realise straightaway that it's the same person whose blog you've been reading (until you start to notice some lexical similarities in their writing and begin to suspect it), and then someone* proposes a real-life forum meet-up, and you go along, and it turns out that the person whose blog you've been reading and who you've been conversing with on the chat forum is actually really very nice and likes Neal Stephenson too and everything, but you're married so you don't think anything of it, and anyway you aren't actually sure he isn't gay, and then later your marriage ends for unrelated reasons and you start hanging out with this person a bit more and you seem to get on quite well and everything and then about nine months later you ask them out on a date and they decline, and you aren't really surprised because you didn't think they were going to go for it anyway, and then three months after that you're both sitting on your sofa discussing how pleasant it is being single when the other person quite unexpectedly leans over to kiss you and says that they would like to see more of you after all, and you're very happy, but at the same time it's all quite complicated because you have to leave the country the next week, and then eight months later you come back to the UK and it's all still going very well with this other person and so you decide to leave your swish London job, your fancy London office and your nastily-carpeted London bachelorette flat and move to Cornwall (which is nicer than London, and a one-bedroom flat there doesn't cost three million pounds) to live with them?

Eeek.

And hurrah!


* That 'someone' being, of course, the lovely cello, to whom I am indebted, probably along with Neal Stephenson, for my current state of happy Cornwallwardsmovingness.

37 comments:

Smat said...

I'm sure it happens to everyone. Doesn't it?
(enjoy the next part of your life btw)

Anonymous said...

Hurrah indeed!
All the very best to you both, lovely news.

Billy said...

Oh. My. God.

Congrats and hurrah!

I hope this isn't setting a precedent, that'd been I'd have to move to Chelmsford. Yikes!

ScroobiousScrivener said...

Oooh! Golly! Yay!

Sylvia said...

OK, who's won the sweepstake, then?
It was obvious this was going to happen, but not so obvious when.
Like that Mac and Caroline thing. Only not so infuriating and frustrating.

Well done you.
Oh, and happy birthday.

Is LC sobbing and clutching your legs as you try to leave the office? He should be. He'll only go feral if you're not there.
Like the office girls! Ok, Ok, enough of that.

Anonymous said...

Cogratulations P! What wonderful news!

Betty said...

Congratulations all round.

Unfortunately, I happened to fall for someone who lives in Bexleyheath rather than Cornwall. Still, we all have our cross to bear ...

Valerie said...

I think this is all cause for serious celebration. And that it's a smart move.

Rob's and my story is strangely similar. I think getting to know each other in these internetty ways helps cement the base of the relationship, and I think it's a good thing. Though I'm biased.

Best of luck! When's moving day?

patroclus said...

Thanks all - yes, all very exciting, although I think I will probably get lynched by An Gof the minute I set foot over the border.

Billy: Or Llewtrah might have to move to the Bush...

Sylvia: LC is probably overjoyed that his tea-making workload will shortly be halved.

Betty: I think Bexleyheath sounds very romantic, but I might be mixing it up with Heathcliff.

Moving day is sometime in early November. We have to find somewhere to live first...

LC said...

LC is already eyeing up Patroclus's nice corner desk.




































...and is also very sad she's leaving...

cello said...

Shucks. Silly thing is, it's made me almost as happy* as you two are. Go pick those blackberries girl.

* ...on the one hand, but on the other hand you'll be a bit further away physically, so that's sad. I know you virtual people don't think it matters, but where would you two be now if you had never met IRL?

Annie said...

Nice post.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, but you don't mean that Cello is a second identity for James where he can pretend to be someone who doesn't have a blog, do you? No, that would be silly.

All the best.

Spinsterella said...

Eeeeek! and Yaaaay!

Aw. Aren't blog romances lovely?

Are you still going to get to boss lc around from a distance?

Anonymous said...

wow! and congratulations!

*wipes away a tear*

James Henry said...

Wait, what?

Tim F said...

Of course he's not gay. Them don't have no gays in that Cornwall. And that's not the only similarity it has with Iran.

My word verification is "ewhcherr", which is either a big lippysmacky kiss, or the sound of retching. The choice is yours.

(Nice one, the both of you, by the way. Be happy.)

Oli said...

Westward Ho!* is in Devon... but welcome to Cornwall anyway. It's nice here.

* Yes, that really is an exclamation mark in a place name. It should happen more.

patroclus said...

I knew someone would pick me up on that title, thanks Oli.

Geoff said...

But London looks so attractive from my window.

Er, no.

patroclus said...

LC: One day, all of this will be yours - the corner desk, the military-grade filing cabinet with the indie record label stickers on it, the stash of nicotine patches, the half-dead plant from IKEA, the humorous stressball shaped like a sofa, the humorous stressball shaped like a penguin, the humorous stressball shaped like a penguin on a sofa, the humorous stressball shaped like a ball of fluff and hair - no wait, that is a ball of fluff and hair, ugh.

Tim: Don't let Rufus Wainwright hear you say that - he's already got it in for the Cornwallians for not being black enough.

Geoff: I too will miss my view of the Chiswick sorting office vehicle yard, replete as it is (not at the moment, though, obviously) with sweary, recklessly driving postal workers. Er, no.

patroclus said...

Also:

cello: Without your assistance we would still be in the metaverse, innit? Although it's not the same, is it, and also the metaverse is getting more rubbish by the day. I blame my arch-enemy FACEBOOK for that. Bring back WorldsAway!

Annie R: Thanks - I've always wanted to tell the entire, unabridged, unexpurgated, wholly unedited story of this relationship in one sentence. I'm going to have to set myself a new goal now, dammit.

BiB: This is eminently possible. James has many identities, most of them female. Although as cello doesn't have eyes that glow in the dark, ears that look like antennae, psychedelic leggings or a propensity for sudden bouts of open-cast mining, I'd say she can safely be ruled out.

Spin: Sadly I must relinquish my power over LC, like that time when Superman went all weak and had to hide in an ice cave.

UC: Thank you - and here, have a tissue. Any words of sage advice regarding relocating from the capital will be much appreciated.

James: Oh, nothing.

GreatSheElephant said...

Congratulations

Anonymous said...

hmmm - no i don't believe i know that thing. i'm still obsessing on that thing that happens when your big toe get hooked in the opposite trouser leg.
but hooray for you both, nonetheless!

Anonymous said...

oops that was me

Anonymous said...

Awww! Also, hurrah! How lovely. You've made me feel all warm and benevolent to mankind. I may even be kind to small children at work tommorow.

llewtrah said...

Oooh congrats :) Better start checking in case Billy is quietly moving in ;) Honestly Billy, you can leave a toothbrush here you know!

Anonymous said...

Yay! All the best to both of you.

I'm going to head back to my real life with a big smile on my face

Timorous Beastie said...

Oh, congratulations. Who knew love would blossom unbidden on the sofa like that? I hope you'll still blog and tell us tales from Darkest Kernow.

Unknown said...

Pleeeeeze move to an abandoned tin mine, or at least somewhere with one next door. i remember reading how the famous five went down one once and saw 'colours that were impossible to imagine'. That was probably in 'Five in the Sky with Diamonds and Lashings of Hallucinogens'.

smoo2 said...

Congratulations patroclus! I hope you will be very happy together. Welcome to the lovely South-West!

Arabella said...

Oh! Aww!
Happiness, both.

Anonymous said...

Huzzah! Just learn the lyrics of "And Shall Trelawney Die?" before you go and you'll be fine..

Knowing you're into steampunk
I saw this and thought it might interest you.

http://www.monkeyshinesbeadery.com/category/jewelry/steampunk/

Occasional Poster of Comments said...

Congratulations, both on the news and the length of that sentence :) See you soon-ish, no doubt.

West said...

"You know that thing where you meet someone on a chat forum, but they've got a made-up name, and so you don't realise straightaway that it's the same person whose blog you've been reading..."

Well, yes, P. Something similar almost happened to me. Said chat forum someone whose name I didn't recognise but whose style rang many a bell told they'd take care of me and that I should get out of the abusive, domestic violence-riddled relationship I had been suffering in up to that point. To be fair, it wasn't all her fault - I really do have to shoulder some of the responsibility myself; I'm sure if it wasn't for the alcohol I'd be less likely to shout at and beat the living shite out of my partner every night) The plan was simple; to go and live with them in Utoxeter where we'd make ends meet by selling his vintage collection of clock faces made out of obscure post-punk singles or, failing that, prostitution.

Well, I can hear you say; quelle problemo? And normally I'd agree. Indeed, the camper van was three-quarters packed when I finally catch sight of my intended furtively reading a book about Futurist art behind the garden hedge and wiping the saliva on the sleeve of a leather elbowed tweed jacket and realise that I've come within a whisker of spending the rest of my life with none other than Paul Morley...

So, you'll agree; a very close shave. I mean, I wouldn't have minded Sheridan...

Anonymous said...

Late to the party, as ever, but
hooray!
and congratulations.

That must have been quite a birthday

DavetheF said...

I'm really glad for you, er not FOR you or for YOU, but gladferyu. It is your time! Given your plot arc in this tale, the next step is a bestselling novel. Best of everything.