Thursday, August 28, 2008

Mannequin Pis

Given that Elle Decoration comes out with a 'small spaces' supplement on average about three times a year, I often wonder how they keep coming up with ideas to fill it.

I mean, there are only so many ways you can fit a desk under the stairs, or drawers *into* the stairs, or a mezzanine bedroom into the achingly fashionable live-work space that you created from a disused shipping container.

But this time, the Elle Deco team have surpassed themselves. They've located a tiny Belgian house in which the toilet is next to the bed, and the bed is next to an uncurtained plate-glass, shop-style window:


I know our Continental friends are more relaxed than us uptight Brits, but even so. Would you *really* want this kind of arrangement in your home? (Think carefully, now.)

And more to the point, would you really want to be one of these people's neighbours?

Brrr.

13 comments:

John Cowan said...

And where do you put the litter box, next to the bed where you can conveniently mistake it for your slippers one morning?

But then again, maybe it's a bidet rather than a toilet. It's hard to tell.

chatterbox said...

I thought it was a mirror, until I realised the photographer would have been in shot.

I realise I am not entering into the spirit of this space saving thing, but even if you are happy to give your neighbours a front row seat, won't the bed get wet when you turn the shower on?

Valerie said...

That looks an awful lot like a prison toilet. Are they sure this is a regular apartment?

And I agree with chatterbox... mildewy sheets are not sexy.

ScroobiousScrivener said...

Good lord. Why, why, why on earth wouldn't they at least have curtains? Why? And the toilet next to the bed... I'm going to have to try to erase all knowledge of this place from my mind, it's simply too upsetting.

patroclus said...

John: The litter tray probably goes in the (open plan) wardrobe, thus fulfilling a further dual function as air freshener and moth repellent. The caption suggests it's a toilet rather than a bidet.

Chatterbox: There are other photos in the spread that reveal that it is, in fact, a plate-glass window facing the street.

Valerie: Hm, prison chic - new for A/W 08/09!

Scroobious: Given that this supplement seems to think that the bathroom/bedroom combo is a splendid idea, I do wonder sometimes if Elle Deco isn't actually a parody of itself. In the same issue there's a completely straight-faced editorial from Michelle Ogundehin about how she set herself on fire by removing her nail polish while sitting too close to a Diptyque candle. If that's not parody, it's crying out for it.

Anonymous said...

Belgian (or rather the Flemish) and the Dutch always have steep stairs. Easier to have the loo by the bed.

Anonymous said...

nah. i'm continental and i'm not relaxed enough for this. no way.

Boz said...

I can't help notice the (very stylish looking) clothes are hanging very close to a toilet that is too trendy to even have a lid.

Shelves in the stairs. That's so 1980s.

All I want to know is who lives there and where on the internet can I ask them if their suits smell of pooh.

Jayne said...

I know several men who'd love it - they'd be able to have a wee without getting out of bed...

Sylvia said...

Ooh. Not keen at all. MInd you, I'm a big fan of Laura Ashley, so don't take my word for it...

cello said...

I think such a loo offers excellent inhibition-shedding training for childbirth.

I am very much enjoying this flourish of productivity, Patch, particularly as I know we are going to have to survive without you any time soon.

Anonymous said...

was this picture taken in amsterdam? x

asta said...

How clever to be able to use the shower to wash all your clothes without ever taking them off the hangers.

The toilet is a giant vase.

See, it's perfect.