EXT. INVERNESS AIRPORT - DAY
PATROCLUS, MR BC and the BLUE KITTEN are disembarking from Easyjet flight EZ393 from Bristol.
ME: Well, that went well. I'm glad Sylvia advised me to feed the Kitten on the ascent and descent, she didn't seem to get earache at all.
MR BC: No. And you coped with the breastfeeding in public thing very well.
ME: Only because I was sitting by the window, and you could hide me with the Guardian.
MR BC: Yes.
ME: Of course if we do the same on the way back, we'll have to sit on the other side of the aisle.
MR BC: Why's that?
ME: Because we'll be travelling the other way.
There is a moment's silence, during which I reflect on what I've just said, and the Nobel committee hastily revise the shortlist for this year's Prize for Stupidity.
MR BC: I think you'll find it doesn't actually matter what side of the plane we sit on.