EXT. MARKET STREET, FALMOUTH - MORNING
PATROCLUS and MR BC are pottering about in town.
Mr BC: Hmm, well I'm ahead of schedule with episode two, I think I could quite justifiably, erm...
Me: Quite justifiably what?
Mr BC: Well, I mean, if you didn't mind...
Me: Didn't mind what?
Mr BC: If they haven't sold out, I mean...
Me: Haven't sold out of what?
Mr BC: Grand Theft Auto.
Me: Oh! No, I think you *should* get it.
Mr BC: Really? But what if I get horribly addicted to it and start playing it 23 hours a day and shouting 'THAT's what you get for messing with the J-Man!' at some poorly-rendered Eastern Europeans?
Me: I think you should - it'll probably be the last chance you get to play unspeakably violent computer games before the baby's born.
Mr BC: Really? You don't mind?
Me: Not at all. Plus I like watching you play computer games, it's fun.
Mr BC: You are the best girlfriend ever.
INT. LIVING ROOM - AFTERNOON
Mr BC is playing Grand Theft Auto IV, successfully sourced from Woolworths.
Me: Why are you driving that man's car?
Mr BC: I think it's my job.
Me: But you don't know your way around! And you keep crashing into things!
Me: You just ran over a pedestrian! Did you mean to do that?
Me: I can't *believe* your cousin hired you to be his driver. You can't even turn a corner without knocking over a lamp-post!
Me: You're on the wrong side of the road!
Me: Oh god, you're going to hit that wall, oh god, I can't look!
Me: Do you even *have* a driving licence?
Mr BC: Maybe we should go for a walk.