Monday, February 19, 2007

Treading Water

I'm treading water on the blog rather, while several pivotal, crucial and unimaginably far-reaching aspects of my life click into place.

At least I hope they're going to click into place - they might shatter under the pressure and fly off in hundreds of different directions, like the retaining wall of a lego viking fortress when a cack-handed amateur (me) attempts to slot in the gate to the dragon's cage.

I was going to regale you in the meantime with a colourful tale from my past, probably the one about when I was manhandled by the police during an episode of mass civil disobedience on royal property (my relationship with QEII & co having been somewhat varied over the years), but then I started thinking about the weighty aspects of my life that are about to click into place (or not), and then I started thinking about lego, and then I thought I'd quite like a cup of mint and liquorice tea, and then...

*goes to make tea*

...but you know, by this time next week everything should have become clear, and I can stop wittering on in such a vague and annoying fashion. I hope.

31 comments:

Valerie Polichar said...

Tea, really, is the great Default of the universe. It all comes back to tea. It may be possible to just answer 'a cup of tea' to all questions that one does not wish to (or cannot) answer.

E.g.:
What's happening in your life that has you on such tenterhooks?
A cup of tea.

What did your Lego turn into?
A cup of tea.

What did you, in fact, leave on the Queen's lawn?
A cup of tea.

What do you want to be when you grow up?
Why, a cup of tea. How nice of you to ask.

Spinsterella said...

disobedience on royal property?

Phew, I was getting a bit worried about all that bowing earlier.

patroclus said...

Valerie: It's at times like these that I am thankful to be British. Truly there is no burden that can't be lightened with the preparation and consumption of a nice cup of tea.

Spin: The bowing was just to lull her into a false sense of security while I sneakily aged ten years and started protesting against the Criminal Justice Bill on her lawn.

James Henry said...

This is why they invented special Girl Lego, which you could use to make bracelets and kittens and stuff.

It's the only language they understand, you know.

Anonymous said...

I think I know what's going to happen. Your south-of-France set, office and boyfriend have all got together and decided that they must centripetally be located at a central point. So you're all moving to Rouen. Do I win five pounds?

patroclus said...

James: Yes.

BiB: Good guess, although I think Orléans might be more of a central point.

(If anyone from the office is reading, rest assured that we aren't relocating to Orléans.)

Dave said...

*Takes a very deep breath, in anticipation of holding it in eager anticipation of more news*

Taiga the Fox said...

I have spent few months by smashing Lego Midgård dragon's teeth everywhere around the house. It's somewhat satisfying.

Mangonel said...

Lego Midgård?! Christ on a bike. Just googled it - haven't felt such a pang of pure LUST in a good long while.

Mangonel said...

Oh - and Famous Cups of Tea -

The start of David's Tennancy as the good Doctor was kickstarted by one

D. Adams, of course.

Rog said...

Meccano never used to fall apart like Lego. It kick-started the Industrial Revolution.

patroclus said...

Mango: I'd pay good money for lego christ on a bike.

Murph: So it did, although the earliest blueprints for the Bridgewater Canal show that it was originally intended to be built from Stickle Bricks.

GreatSheElephant said...

ah yes - mint and licorice. Delicious. Saveurs du Soir brand perchance?

Lucy Diamond said...

Lego Christ on a bike - absolute genius. Surely a must for next year's advent calendar? I think you're onto something there.

What about the Lego Aqua Raiders, then? I think they look pretty good but unfortunately the mean amount of pocket money I give my son has meant he's only been able to buy the teeny weeny divers set so far. (But they were fab!)

patroclus said...

GSE: Currently it's Florance, although I find theirs a bit sickly. I prefer Marché U's own-brand version, but I haven't tried Saveurs du Soir. Will seek it out in Ecomarché later.

Lucy: Hmm, Aqua Raiders is new to me. Maybe I could send some Aqua Raiders down the back of the bookshelves to retrieve the lego fireball that got catapulted down there during a historically authentic recreation of the Battle of Ekkialsbakki.

Congratulations on the book, by the way. I meant to say that last time too. I'm probably hopelessly late now, sorry.

Lucy Diamond said...

You're not hopelessly late at all, it's not out yet! Cheers though.

Arabella said...

Treading water? I hope you have a bathing cap adorned with rubber daisies and lots of moisturizer.

realdoc said...

The girly lego stuff, Ello is quite cool really. You can make good waterfalls and tropical jungles but probably not tea.

Anonymous said...

Treading water is underrated. It's laid back, serene, and infinitely preferable to butterfly

Lorna said...

Ooh... I'm holding my breath in anticipation. Please tell us what's up soon, or I'll turn a fetching shade of blue and fall off my chair.

Thanks for the congratualtions over at my place, by the way! Gawain sounds far more chic than Chaucer, too ;)

Billy said...

I'd quite like a lego teapot.

Taiga the Fox said...

You surely all have seen these before, but just in case, here is a lego jesus, without a bike though.

Arabella said...

Ooh Taiga, I followed the link. 'The Fire of Yaweh' looks particularly good.

patroclus said...

Taiga: I'd forgotten all about the Brick Testament, thanks for reminding me! It is utterly brilliant. Everyone else look too!

FirstNations said...

i an in no way distracted by this talk of tea and legos. harrumph.
waiting.
watching.
*squints in a knowing and critical manner*

llewtrah said...

Oooh Lego! The Japanese verson is 0937 (LEGO upside down on a calculator screen!). I had several biscuit tins of it as a kid and I ended up going into engineering! I think dad gave it all away to a hospital.

realdoc said...

I am just loving the lego bible. I'm watching Troy at the moment Patroclus isn't it time for a lego Iliad?

Dave said...

Dash, Realdoc beat me to it. I was going to tell you that you were on TV last night - looking a tad effeminate, if I may say so. Got bored, turned off and went and made a nice cup of Earl Grey instead.

Urban Chick said...

*on tenterhooks*

9/10ths Full of Penguins said...

I think the Brick Testament rules. As an RE teacher I have used it loads of times and come across new bits that make me chuckle every time.

This picture of the aftermath of one of Joshua's battles looking like a scene from lego Braveheart

http://www.thebricktestament.com/judges/massacre_at_bezek/jg01_04c.html

mad muthas said...

oh that lego moment - things fall apart, the centre cannot hold, mere anarchy is loosed upon the world - followed by a shrill and inconsoleable scream as your 8-year-old (or whatever) sees a whole morning's work bite the dust.
and it hurts to step on.
why did i buy so much of the bloody stuff?