Monday, January 22, 2007

A Short Post About Films

'I know,' said the lovely Mr BC, 'let's watch All Known Films In Which A Body Part Is Severed And Then Comically Mislaid, And In Which A Large Spider Also Gets On A Woman.'

And so it came to pass that last night we watched low-budget Brit-horror-action-comedy Severance, and high-budget Raymond Chandler homage Kiss Kiss Bang Bang. And both of them were great.

Everyone must see Severance, for not only is it surprisingly gripping and yet also pleasingly funny, and not only is Danny Dyer very likeable in it, and not only does a cute blonde chick get to smack up baddies with a big stick, but it was also written by one of us, namely a blogger, namely the mighty James Moran. And a fine job he has done too.

Also I liked Kiss Kiss Bang Bang because it has good colours. And because someone mentions a talking monkey that comes from the future and only says 'ficus', which is the best line in a film ever.

You can see why I don't really do film reviews.

33 comments:

violetforthemoment said...

I bought Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang on DVD months ago and have yet to watch it - but having just seen the Big Sleep at the NFT I'm right in the mood for it, and your post has made it seem like fate. There isn't a big spider in it though, is there? That Shelob out of the Lord of the Rings made me absolutely cack myself.

Tabby Rabbit said...

Does 'Saw' fall into that category. Though may not have required comical aspects. Or giant spiders.

llewtrah said...

Sounds like an episode of Dr Who!

patroclus said...

Ooh Violet, definitely watch it - it's Chandleresque but at the same time very, very funny and very, very stylish. The spider's only in it for a moment, to comic effect.

Tabby: I haven't seen Saw, and I can only suppose that this is because it doesn't have a large spider in it, getting on a woman. If it does, I shall definitely watch it.

Tim Footman said...

Llewtrah's got a point. Sounds like two separate DW stories: 'Planet of the Spiders' (Jon Pertwee's last outing), in which a big spider gets on Sarah Jane's back; and 'The Hand of Fear' (coincidentally, the last Sarah Jane story before her recent overdue return, and could I just take this opportunity to reiterate that oh yes, I still *would*) which revolves around the discovery of the severed hand of Eldrad, a renegade Kastrian.

Please excuse me, I must now purchase a new cagoule.

Billy said...

Aagh, I've arrived in the middle of a Doctor Who conversation...

Ooh, James Moran has a blog. Wow!

patroclus said...

Tim Footman! I am at this very moment removing my brand spanking new K-9 badge (free off the cover of this month's SFX magazine, Who fans), and sending it to Bangkok post haste, for I am not worthy of it.

Anonymous said...

Stay. Off. My. Turf.

Grrrrr.

patroclus said...

Only if you stay off mine.

Tim Footman said...

Can I be the first to coin a new word for the fair demarcation of subject matter in web 2.0?

"BLURF"

Anonymous said...

Cheers, patroclus - I'm incredibly pleased to fall into the same category as KKBB, because it was one of my favourite films that year, and Shane Black is my hero. And I don't care that it's a very *specific* category that only really includes those 2 films. It counts.

Billy: I certainly do, and it's wicked, if I say so myself.

Anonymous said...

P,You may not think of yourself as much of a film reviewer, but not many bloggers have the director of said film in their comment thread.

Also Tim, if Sarah Jane counts as an 'old woman' there's not much chance for me.

Anonymous said...

Ooops sorry writer not director, still impressive though.

Tim Footman said...

Who called her an old woman? All that time travel must be very good for the skin.

patroclus said...

Ooh, bit late, but:

Ladies and gentlemen, Mr James Moran - look upon his works, ye mighty...and then maybe pop over to his blog and tell him if you liked them.

Tim: you win a Super Prize for coining the most horrible blog-related neologism yet. 'Blurf'. Urgh.

Also: Am I the last person in the world to have realised that TABBY RABBIT IS BACK? Woohoo!

frangelita said...

Two of my favouritest fimls of late! And I only saw Severance this weekend. Must confess it scared me quite a lot. Liked the head loppage in particular, though. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang - hilarious.

baggiebird said...

Have been meaning to watch severance for a while, I really must get hold of a copy. I shall possibly dothat this weekend

Interpreter Pavlov said...

Easy leader in the Severance genre is Cours toujours (Desperate US version: Dad on the Run) in which, apart from its concentration on circumcision and ritual prepuce-burial, and if I remember correctly, also features a spider on the Pope, tho' this feature isn't prominent.

Will this do?

Spinsterella said...

Ooh - I watched a 'horror' movie once on the telly where there were lots of body parts - each wrapped up in brown paper - hidden in various places in a cellar.

Then they all came together of their own accord and made a brown-paper-monster! Terrifying.

cello said...

Mm, I think if Interpreter Pavlov can get away with classifying a prepuce as a body part I shall immediately go and trawl my film collection for spiders plus dandruff or toe-nails. Or is that a very female view of foreskins?

patroclus said...

There's probably a good argument for the foreskin being a bona fide body part, cello, but can Pavlov get away with classifying the Pope as a woman?

Interpreter Pavlov said...

Aha! Stand by for Prepuce Wars!

I'm wondering if Spinsterella's body parts all came from the same creature, thereby ensuring a more or less kosher monster? Whereas the prepuce in the film 'Cours toujours' required burial according to Jewish custom, and the comedy ensued from the difficulties of finding open ground in which to bury the wrapped prepuce when you live in a flat in Paris. An interesting extension of Spin's film, with puissant ecclesiastical overtones, would be if all the wrapped and buried prepuces in the world suddenly arose, united and overwhelmed the Pope. Think on, Gentiles.

chatterbox said...

Absolutely nothing to add, but just felt moved to say that the discussion here is representative of all that makes blog lurking worthwhile... And, I will go to buy Severance now, although I'll have to watch it with the light on!

Word verif 'dukwhdhn' - the sort of ornament my grandmother had on her mantelpiece?

patroclus said...

Ahh, thanks Chatterbox, glad to know you're still lurking!

Severance is more 'funny' and 'gripping' than scary, so you'll probably be OK with the lights suitably dimmed.

DavetheF said...

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is, as "anonymous" pointed out, the magnificent return to form of screenwriter Shane Black. I don't think I've enjoyed a film that much since Withnail and I.

But the film you MUST see is A Scanner Darkly, the first real Philip K Dick movie. Robert Downey is amazing in it. It's Richard Linklater's second rotoscope animation/live action movie after Waking Life (another must-see although the visual technology is still rather in its infancy). For a fascinating look at this technique see wikipedia.

rashbre said...

Last one I saw was that snake filem, whilst I was on a 747.

here via Britblogs.

rashbre

patroclus said...

Yes DavetheF, I *do* really want to see A Scanner Darkly, thanks for reminding me! I might go and buy that this very afternoon, in fact. That 'anonymous' was James Moran, but he (along with others) seems to have been mysteriously anonymised when I made the jump to light speed, I mean New Blogger.

Also welcome to Rashbre - I am lookin at your blog right now.

Winters said...

Hail and well met, Patroclus. I just floated here on the Molly Bloom/llewtrah magic carpet.

Intriguing films. I'll try to check them out.

A watched a great and very low-budget film recently; "Bucket of Blood."
Directed by whoever it was that directed "Little Shop of Horrors."

Good stuff.

9/10ths Full of Penguins said...

Hello

I loved Severance. I particularly liked the scene with the big American guy, the two prostitutes and the rocket launcher...

Had me chuckling for days. DAYS I TELL YOU!

entropy said...

I think Spinsterella's film was "Asylum", also known as "House of Crazies" (looked it up in order never to see it by accident).

patroclus said...

Good sleuthing, entropy! Also, welcome to winters and nine-tenths!

After a two-day mission that took in the audiovisual emporia of Chiswick, Hammersmith, Oxford Street and Islington, I have finally tracked down (in Hammersmith HMV) a copy of A Scanner Darkly, and plan to watch it this very evening. A review may or may not be forthcoming.

DavetheF said...

Patro, be sure to watch the special features, they are absolutely ace, including an interview with PKD's daughter, who was involved with the project, and fascinating clips of the old loony himself laying out his paranoid theories.

James Moran said...

Yes, that was me up there, so I'm staking my claim to the comment in case anyone tries to steal it and take over my identity causing a personality crisis and thereby split me into a good and evil version of myself, who would have to fight to the death.

Asylum is a great movie, proper scary too. I have nothing else to say. Carry on.